Blog PostsOctober 2017

“Move On”…. Two words I am struggling with.

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Harry S. Truman, the 33rd President of the United States. Most people in USA know him as savior who saved them in second world war. He was like a hero in those days and he still is but in Japan thing are different it is quite opposite. Japanese people know him as an assailants who took almost 150,000 lives (can argue on the figures) with his one decision i.e. nuclear attack on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. After the attacks when Japanese were down and they trying to stand on their feet, collect what left though it was not much Emperor of Japan(Emperor Hirohito) gave an emotional speech and he addressed his people and literally you can sum up his entire speech containing tens of words in two simple words “Move On”. So have they moved on?

I am sure most of them tried to move on but I highly doubt they succeeded and in fact those who claim they have moved on still somewhere deep down in their hearts have never forgotten what Americans did to them or to their ancestors and they should not because losing lives is something you can not forget.

All I am trying to say is that we never move on, irrespective of the fact how depressed and empty it make us form inside, we just start compromising with ourselves and with our lives, we create a camouflage for us and start living in that world till our last breath. People say time reduces the pain of our heart, mind and soul. However, can we truly say that? Or is it just a misconception of our mind ? Accepting the facts heal our wounds more than time, longer we take to accept reality longer we suffer. Some of you will call it a process of forgetting past and looking future in short moving on but for me it is very different.

Let say you were in a true love relationship (at least in your head or in your heart). Say (hypothetically) you lost her/him for some supernatural or unearthly reasons and now you are trying to get your shit together so that at least you can focus on yourself, but repeatedly you will be consoled by your family, friends or workmates. Hell, unknowingly you will be consoled by social media users who will intimidate you by their random posts or tweets on love, relationship etc. Tons of advice or suggestions but again crux of those suggestions or advices will always remain same i.e. two words philosophy “Move on”.

Has it ever happened to you (if you were in relationship) that someone texted you from an unknown number and the first person you thought it could be was your ex?

Or has it ever happened to you when you were in park or movie hall or somewhere else and suddenly you saw a couple and you started thinking about your ex? And in nights when you are inside your bed trying to sleep but couldn’t because you are thinking about your ex even if your current partner is beside you. If answer is yes then why we say we have moved on? If answer is no then we really have to think if we ever were in love with someone.

I mean for god sake, what if one does not want to leave that feeling or one does not want to forget what happened to him/her in his/her relationship. Moving on is not a solution, of course it is one of the way to reduce your pain and yes burden of past is nothing but a burden however the fact is that moving on is not a cure but accepting the fact and reality is. Accepting the reality is difficult and it is not moving on but it helps you to live your life with less pain like Japan and Japanese never moved on but they accepted the reality, they still mourn H&N attacks every year and yet they are the third largest economy of the world.

However, there cannot be any comparison (there should not be any) between Japanese losing lives in Hiroshima and Nagasaki and a broken heart lover, but one thing is common both hit by a bomb came out of the blue.

There are few feelings or expressions, which only can be understood by a person who is suffering like pain in heart when you lose something important or someone breaks your heart. As they say, “Only the wearer knows where the shoe pinches”, but in this world people will give you advices, suggestions and their unsolicited solutions irrespective of the fact how useful it is or not. Sometime I feel they have nothing to do in their own lives but I guess it is human nature. Of course this is how world works, if you are sad people will console you if you are happy people envy you. In today’s world when you are alive people will not care, but they will shed tears when you are dead. it shows how vigorously we have accepted “Move On” philosophy. The never-ending battle between mind and heart has existed from centuries and will continue to exist forever.

My struggle with those two words started when I lost her in an incident and I am still struggling with it but it is not a regret or a grief, it is a happy struggle. May be I am the only one who is happy without moving on or thinks we never move on but don’t they say we only live once?

So if we live once then we only love once rest is nothing but compromises and I refuse to compromise. My struggle is beautiful because she is still a part of it, I for sure not going to give her place to anyone and I am living my life to the full so why should I move on.

My life with her memories is more beautiful……


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